Vulnerable
by Last Munichorn
Summary: How Cameron manages to get into Thirteen's life...
1. Feeling the connection

**Chapter 1 – Feeling the connection**

As she sits there full of hatred and anger, staring to the ground that is about 15 meters below her feet, she ponders about jumping for a short while. Never turning her gaze away from the depth she is sitting in front of, she tries to sum up the happenings of today in her mind.

_Remy is sitting in the darkened room and gaping at the printer in front of her that will give her the answer she kind of expects anyway. She thinks about bursting the paper that comes out of the printer without even reading it but as it lies in front of her she can't stop herself from taking it and looking at it. As she recognizes the red colored line which says "POS" she frowns._ Huntington's,_she thinks. _Of all the tings I could have inherited from my mom, I had to get her disease. _A silent tear ran down her cheek. As she realized it, she harshly wiped it away and stormed out of the room and up to the roof. She climbed the steps as fast as she could and crashed the door open. Totally out of breath she sat down at the edge of the roof and sat there just looking down into the lowness…_

Suddenly Remy got kicked out of her thoughts as the door opened loudly at the other end of the roof. She stared at the visitor breathtaken and tried to hold back her tears. Allison Cameron looked at her with surprise. She stepped nearer never saying a word to the still dumbfounded Remy Hadley. Cameron sat next to Hadley and joined her in looking down the building. Hadley still wasn't able to take her gaze off of Cameron. After a few minutes Cameron looked up at her and gave her a smile. Remy instead just looked at her questioning.

"Wh-", she started her sentence but got cut off.

"House came to me looking for you and as no one could find you I thought about the place that I go to to think about stuff. So I got up here and surprise… I found you."

"But why-", again Cameron did not let her finish her question.

"I saw you hurrying down the hall befor and I thought no matter what it is that's upsetting or hurting you, I don't want you to be alone with it."

"You don't even know me", Hadley tried to make her point.

"I know, but I would really like to get to know you. So what brings you up here?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Like I thought. House told me you… might have Huntington's. Is that true?" Cameron looks at Remy with a sad look on her face. Remy looks into the blondes green warmly eyes and seems to get lost in them. As she didn't answer the question and stayed in silence just looking into Cameron's eyes, she gets kicked out of her trance when a hand touches her leg. She glares down and sees the older doctor's hand caressing it. She looks up and sees the look of concern in the slightly smaller women's eyes. _"Wow…those eyes are amazing",_ she thinks to herself.

"You made that test, didn't you?" Cameron asked her.

Remy didn't know what to say. She just stood up, went back in the direction of the door, turned around once more to look at a concerned Cameron staring at her with her deep green eyes and sees her disappear in front of her eyes…´

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Tell me what you think about it. This is my first fanfic so please be kind =)


	2. How Come?

**Chapter 2 – How Come?**

…"_You made the test, didn't you?" _

Cameron' words resounded in Thirteens head as she slowly opens her eyes, still feeling a little dizy. The first she saw was the worried sight of the blonde woman leaning over her and stroking her hair. Remy recognized her head lying in Cameron's lap and as the older doctor saw Remy's eyes flutter open she caressed her cheek and looked at her with release ridden in her green eyes. A little smile came on the smaller women's lips and Remy tried to find out what happened. Before she could say anything, Cameron spoke up with an ernest look on her face.

"I think I will take that answer as a yes and will let the second question out. I'm sorry for that. I just… I really care for you and I wanted to help you, to have someone and not live through all that alone. But I never wanted it to turn out like that. I don't know…I-"

Now it was Thirteens time to interrupt her. She lay her hand in the older doctor's one and gave her a small smile.

"Well seems like you're kind of sweeping me off my feet in a paradox sort of way", she said with a hint of sarcasm in it.

Cameron could form a smile now, too. She looked at their hands which are still intangled. Then she looks into the ice blue eyes of Remy. She couldn't take her sight off of the brunette. Her eyes had a depth that she couldn't resist. She wondered how much feelings these eyes hide. How much fear and how much sadness. She got interrupted in her thoughts as Thirteen moved herself from her lap and seemed like she wanted to stand up. Just as she was in a sitting possion the blonde took her arm and stopped her.

"Don't you dare!"

"What?" Thirteen was surprised about the blonde's actions.

"What if it happens again?" Cameron had a concerned look on her face. Thirteen liked that look. She found it kind of cute.

"Well it won't and I have to go now."

"To do what? Get a drink, drown in self sorrow and kill yourself before your disease will kill you so that you at least have controle over what will kill you?" Cameron looked at Hadley without ever taking her eyes off of Thirteen's.

Remy was shocked. She couldn't believe what she just heard.

"You don't say so! You think you already know me? You don't! Just back off! Don't cross your bridges before you come to them! I have to go now."

"Don't let me stop you! But think about what I just said. You have noone but you can have me. I can be there for you. I know it's hard for you but you have to go on living. You have to trust people. You-"

"You don't know what I'm up against! Noone does…"

With that Thirteen jumped up on her feet, stormed through the door that led down to the hospital again and left Allison Cameron behind.


	3. Oncall room

**Chapter 3 – The On-call room**

The next morning Remy woke up with a big headache and the first thing she had in her mind was Cameron telling her exactly what she would do after she left her. Well ok, she forgot the meaningless sex with a girl whos name she doesn't even remember and yeah Thirteen is still alive which she is very sure about according to her head. She manages to stand up and walk into her bathroom. When she looks into the mirror she feels like she sees an empty body. She sees her face and doesn't really recognize it as hers.

Still Remy takes a shower to make it up to work as usual. When she's ready she catches her things and heads out of her apartment straight to her car. Parking her car and exiting it, she makes a note in her head, which still hurts like a bitch, to avoid Cameron as good as possible. She walks into the hospital and straight to the elevator. Entering the Diagnostic Office she's the first one to be there and sit like she always is.

After she got to know that at the moment there was no case she went over to an On-call room to find some sleep.

After like it felt only a few minutes later she heard the door open and someone entering. She decided to just ignore it and act like she didn't wake up by the sound. She heard the footsteps coming nearer and took in the smell of a perfume that reminded her of spring wich was actually weird because it was november.

When the footsteps stopped next to her bed she smelled coffee under her nose. She opened her eyes and took the hand that was placed over her eyes down to look at the person next to her. As she recognized who it was she was shocked.

Cameron.

She remembered this morning when she made the note in her head to avoid her. Well that definitelly failed right now when she stood right in front of her offering her a cup of coffee. Remy took the cup without saying a word and still very confuced about the other woman's presence.

When Cameron didn't move, Remy got herself into a sitting position so that Cameron could sit down next to her which she did right away. A little while of silence fell over the to of them but Remy found that it was kind of comfortable. Cameron seemed nervous and looked down to her hands ling in her lap. After another few minutes Cameron looked up to find Hadley's eyes on her. She had a look full of confusion and Cameron tried to say something, explain herself. She opened her mouth but no words came out. Remy saw how she was trying to negotiate her fear but she just couldn't, so Remy laid her hand on top of Allison's and squeezed it to reassure her that nothing _had_ to be said. Allison looked down at their hands and back to Remy. She looked the brunette right into her beuatiful blue eyes and saw her baffled look as she intertwined their fingers and held on tighter to her hand. Remy saw Allison looking to her lips and back up to her eyes. As Allison leaned into her and their faces were only inches apart from each other they recognized a beep interrupt their moment. Remy felt her pager going off and looked at it. _House, _she thought,_ like he knew it._ Remy catched Allison's eyes once more and saw her nodd her head. No words needed to be said.

No words were spoken in the On-Call room but still there was so much said through their eyes…


	4. Just walking

**Well, that is definitelly not my best work but I somehow just had to write it. Anyway, please read and review.**

Chapter 4

Walking, always just walking. You walk on, every day. Like your heart is always beating, it doesn't just stop. So you don't just stop walking or living. If someone would ask you why, you may not know but maybe someday you will. At least you don't stop. You just hope that someday it would make sense. Everything would seem to lead somewhere and there is a reason for your walking. However, as long as that day has't come yet, you just keep walking, as you always have been and will always be. Searching for the reason?? Well, that doesn't really make sense. It's like searching for real love. You can't find something like that by searching. It just overcomes you someday, some moment without searching for it. At some time it is just there. The sense for your walking, for your breathing, for your living.

Remy was sure of all that and she waited desperatly for that moment to come. But she also knew she couldn't wait forever. _Huntington's._ It always repeated in her mind. 8-10 years… What if she wouldn't find happiness in those years? Just wasting those years with waiting and not getting anything, not reaching that moment? But would it make any difference to search for it the next years and not finding it instead of just living and… well hoping to reach that moment, that happiness, that reason for everything?

The brunette stood in front of her mirror in the bathroom of her appartment. She just stared. She tried to figure out what she sees. Who was she in fact? Did she even know herself? Others knew her as the mysterious one, the girl with Huntington's, the dying girl, the bisexual girl. But did anyone of them really see the real Dr. Remy Hadley? Does _she_ see the real person that she is?

Suddenly it hit her. Dr. Cameron did not just see her as that. Well she noticed her because of all the rumour in the hospital. Yes, House really brought it from diagnostics way to the ER. Hard to believe. But well it's House. But it seemed like Cameron actually wanted to get to know her. See behind the walls of this mystery that Remy was. Seeing behind _Thirteen._ Yeah. She didn't want to see the number that House made her become. She didn't want to get to know Thirteen. She wanted to know what was behind it. She really wanted to see Remy. Wanted to know what those ice blue piercing eyes have to say and what's behind the façade. Sometimes the thoughts of Allison Cameron crossed the thoughts of the reason and the happiness in Remy's head. She wondered if the blonde could be the key for everything. They _did_ almost kiss in the oncall room. They didn't even say one word in that room, minutes were passing and nothing was said. Was that even a good thing? Remy didn't know. But there's definitelly something that made it difficult. Cameron lost her husband because of cancer, so she already saw a loved one dying one time. Remy would never want her to relive that, and she knew she would die in a few years. One year more or less would not change that.

Maybe she should try finding happiness without love so that he won't hurt anyone too bad when she eventually dies because of her disease. She would just keep on walking and living her life hoping someday that happiness would come to her and she would at least have some little time worth living.


	5. Get this party started!

So, I let you people wait long enough. Let's get this party started and bring some swing into it =) Hope you will enjoy it!

As Thirteen entered the locker room after her shift at about 8 p.m. she thought about what to do for the night. She could definitelly not go home. Going home meant being alone, being alone would lead her to thinking and thinking is something she did really not want to do right now. So going home was not a choice. She went over to her locker, stripped from her lab coat and put it in. Suddenly she heard the door open and someone entered the room. When she looked up she found Cameron looking at her.

"Hey!" That was all Cameron managed to get out.

"Hey yourself," Hadley said and smiled at Cameron, trying to ease the tense situation.

They haven't seen each other for almost a week since the scene in the on-call room.

"Good mood?"

"Well, I just decided to go out a little, that's all," Thirteen said shrugging.

"To do what? A little drinking? A little fucking around?"

"How did you find out about the last part? Last time you didin't say anything about that when you were accusing me," Thirteen said smirking at the blonde in front of her.

"Well, people talk, Thirteen. Do you really think this does you any good?"

"Actually, yeah I think so, but hey if you are so concerned, why don't you just join me and take care of me?" She was now grinning from ear to ear because she knew Cameron was shocked and would probably say no anyways.

Cameron noticed Thirteen's behaviour. _She wants me to say no. Look who's laughing now? _Cameron smiled at her thoughts and that didn't go unnoticed by Thirteen.

_Maybe this wasn't such a good idea at all. But on the other side, who would care to have a beautiful blonde joining in a club?_

"Just let me change and then we can head to wherever you're dragging me to. I just hope the place doesn't suck."

"I will be there, so there's no way the place will suck, darling." _She just said yes to mock me, but two people can play that game. _

"Then let's go," Allison said, looking at Remy full of expactation.

When they entered the club, Remy took Cameron's hand and dragged her to the bar, immediately ordering two drinks.

"The usual Remy?" The bartender asked her.

"Yeah, but two of them."

After the drinks were made and given to Remy, she paid for them and handed Allison one glass.

"So here's to us?!" Cameron first didn't answer Hadley, she just looked into her eyes and was caught in those sparkling ice blue eyes looking back at her. Shaking her head out of the daze she finally answered her.

"Sure, here's to the night."

They drank and after two minutes Thirteen had already gulped down her drink.

"You come here often, don't you?"

"Yeah, almost every night, how did you know?"

"Well, the bartender knew your name," the blonde said smiling at the brunette in front of her.

"I do come her a lot. But usually alone."

"Why is that?"

"Because I don't have someone to bring and because this way I find myself a companion here. I actually merely go home alone."

"But tonight is different. I'm here."

"So? Either you go home with me or someone else will. And I am definitelly in the mood for dancing now."

With that Thirteen left a dumbfounded Cameron standing at the bar and looking after her. After one song Remy had already found someone to dance with very close. _So that's her way of playing, no problem for me._

She ordered herself another drink, gulped it down and went to the dance floor. Slowly she began dancing behind Thirteen very close and drove her hands from her waist down to her hips. Remy didn't even turn around to look who's dancing with her. Either she knew or it didn't matter to her. After a while Remy focused more on dancing with the girl behind her and the girl in front of her got bored and disappeared. That's when Remy turned around and smiled at her. _God, she should smile more often._

"So that's your decision?" She asked her, still dancing.

"What do you mean? I'm just enjoying myself," she told Thirteen, arching an eyebrow at her.

"Well, you just decided to leave with me tonight," Remy said smirking at the blonde in front of her. "Don't know what Chase would say but I wouldn't mind."

"Ask him," she whispered into her ear, dancing closer to her now and their cheeks brushing slightly.

As they were dancing closely another song began playing through the speakers.

_You change your mind  
Like a girl changes clothes  
Yeah you, PMS  
Like a bitch, I would know_

"I LOVE this song," Cameron finally said and began dancing like crazy in front of Remy which found the sight pretty funny and also cute.

_And you over think  
Always speak cryptically  
I should know  
That you're no good for me_

As Remy was looking at her she found herself smiling at the blonde who just looked at her confused.

"What is it, Thirteen?"

"Well, first we're here in private, you can call me Remy. And I don't know I just find myself smiling and laughing a lot when you're around."

"I think that's something I like to hear and I love your smile, so it also does something good for me, _Remy. _And because you are not the only person where people don't know a first name-"

"I know your name, _Allison_," Hadley said smirking at her.

"How?"

"There's more than meets the eye, honey." With that Remy started dancing more closely to Cameron heating the situation up.

_'Cause you're hot then you're cold  
You're yes then you're no  
You're in then you're out  
You're up then you're down  
You're wrong when it's right  
It's black and it's white  
We fight, we break up  
We kiss, we make up_

Suddenly Remy felt something that she hadn't felt for a long long time. When the blonde's lips crashed on her lips it was like something changed in her. It was passionate but also full of emotions. Not like the kisses she shared with all those other girls. When their lips parted she looked at Allison who was smiling at her, not smirking but really smiling.

_  
You don't really wanna stay, no  
But you don't really wanna go  
You're hot then you're cold  
You're yes then you're no  
You're in then you're out  
You're up then you're down_

The song kept playing but Thirteen didn't care. She had only eyes for the blonde that was dancing in front of her and she felt like the two of them were in a different world.

_We used to be  
Just like twins, so in sync  
The same energy  
Now's a dead battery_

Used to laugh 'bout nothing  
Now you're plain boring  
I should know  
That you're not gonna change

After a while Remy shook her head out of the daze she was in and saw Allison still looking at her.

"I think I need a drink," was all she could say and left her standing there on the dance floor, watching her walk away.

_Someone call the doctor  
Got a case of love bipolar  
Stuck on a roller coaster  
Can't get off this ride_

You change your mind  
Like a girl changes clothes

After a while Cameron walked after her and when she approached the bar she heard the brunette ordering a whiskey.

"What is your problem? Am I not good enough? You rather take one of those whores who don't give a damn about you?"

"That is the problem. You care. And I care about you and… I don't know if I can do that?"

"Do what? Show feelings?"

"God Allison, I'm dying, you can't change that, I'm not your patient. You can't save me."

"No you're not my patient. What the fuck are you so afraid of?"

"I…I'm afraid of… wait what about Chase?"

"Is that all you have to say right now? You didn't care about him when you asked me out and danced with me. But if that's all, I broke up with him 2 weeks ago." With that Cameron turned around and headed to the exit.

"What the fuck just happened?" Remy looked after her and when her whiskey was placed in front of her, she gulped it down and paid for it.

"Remy what are you waiting for?" The bartender asked her.

"What do you mean, Jimmy?"

"Just go, I've seen the way you look at each other. I wouldn't let her go away just like that."

Remy looked at him, turned around and also headed for the exit calling a "Thanks" at her friend Jimmy.

As Remy exited the club she spotted Cameron with one look. She was sitting at the other side of the street at the bus station. She slowly walked over to her and stopped when she stood in front of her.

"At this time there is no bus service," Remy said, a halfsmile on her face.

When Cameron looked up to her, Remy saw that she must have been crying.

Without saying anything she turned her head back to the ground. Thirteen noticed that the older doctor was shivering and took of her coat, laid it over the blonde's shoulders and sat next to her.

"I'm sorry."

"For what? For not wanting me?"

"No, for acting the way I did earlier. It's not that I don't want you, I just…" Remy trailed of, not knowing what to say for her defence.

"You just what? Remy, what are you afraid of?"

"I'm afraid of falling in love. Getting hurt. But I'm even more afraid that you would fall in love with me and watch another loved one die." Remy looked at the ground and suddenly felt a hand on hers, immediately interwining her fingers with Cameron's.

"Well I think it's to late for that," Allison said, now looking at the brunette who looked up at her when she heard that.

"What do you mean? Why-" With a even more passionate and emotional kiss than before, the blonde stopped the taller woman from talking.

"That's why, Remy. I already am in love with you."

Instead of saying anything, the younger doctor answered with another kiss, one hand in the blonde's hair the other one still interwined with her hand.

"I love you Allison Cameron," she said when they stopped kissing and smiled her million dollar smile at her lover.

THE END

**So that's it. I finally finished it. Sorry it took me so long. I hope you liked it. Please R&R.**


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